MarriageDefinition: Marriage is a legal or formallyrecognized union between two people (Man and woman).
Introduction:Marriage is verysensitive as well as a very strong holy relationship between man and women forlifetime. It is a kind of that love bond and that loveable relationship inwhich husband and wife spend every life moment with each other. They sharetheir happiness, sorrows and love with each other. It’s not only the union oftwo peoples but also the union of two perspective families. Sometimes marriageis arranged and sometimes it depends on likeness by both partners. Everycountry has its own marriage traditions and culture values, but one thing issame all over the globe that is ‘LOVE’. Traditions can be different but love issame.
Here we will discuss marriage customs andtraditions of Pakistan and culture. Marriage traditions of Pakistan and Chinaare totally different. Below is the detailed discussion of it. Firstly I willdiscuss Pakistani marriage culture.Body:Pakistani marriagehas many events given below.1. Beforemarriage· Searchfor proposal· Proposal· Engagement2.
Wedding· Dholkibefore few days of wedding· Ubtan· Rasmeheena· Marriageceremony· Nikkah· AarsiMushaf Dikhana· Rukhsati· Dinner· Gifts· Waleema3. Honeymoon· Shab-e-Zifaf4. RegionalVariations· Attan· Baraat· Bijjar· Dastarbandi· Dholki· Doodhpilai · Haldi· Jolbandi· Maklava· Mobaraki· Paondhulai· Saami5.
ReligiousCustoms· HaqMahr6. Marriagesongs7. ReferencesSearchfor proposal: For wedding of boy or girl a searchis usually done by family members. And this effort is done by any matrimonialsites or relatives or third party member. But now-a-days this trend is losingpopularity. Boys and girls now-a-days select their partners by themselves andgo to court for marriage because they have their own mindset and both familymembers are against of it. Some marriages are arranged by parents and bothpartners understand each other and compromise with each other for themselvesand for their family.
Some marriages are arranged and there is likeness fromboth sides, both partners told to their parents and they send proposal to girlshome and they accept and marry both of them, it’s called semi arrangedmarriage.Proposal:Once a decision has been taken thengrooms family send proposal message to brides home. And grooms family paypotential visit to brides home, and the first visit is purely for the partiesto acquaint with one another and for formal proposal. Then after that visitboth families decide whether they like or dislike each other or not. If both ofthem like each other than proposal message sent to brides home for her hand inmarriage, where elder members of groom’s family asked to bride’s family formarriage proposal. After acceptance both families, grooms family give gifts tobride and brides family offer sweets to grooms family to start a newrelationship not only for boys and girls but also for new two families.
Different kinds of beverages and refreshments are served by bride’s family inhappiness for new life.Engagement:After few days or months ofaccepting marriage proposal from both sides a ceremony is held by both familiesto mark the engagement of couple and is called engagement or mangni in Urdulanguage. It is a small family function in which just couple families areinvolved and they exchange rings to each other.
In traditional values bothcouple don’t sit together, families elder members do this ceremony and exchangerings between boy and girl. Then a prayer and blessings are recited for the coupleand the wedding date is decided.Wedding:Wedding are arranged by familymembers of couple and it is different from each other according to ethnicbackground and religion. However a typical wedding has three major eventsRasm-e-heena, nikkah and waleema.Rasme-heena: Rasm-e-heena is often called as “mehndi” or”henna”, a dye prepared from Lawsonia inermis plant which is mixed with waterand paste is make and applies in both hands of bride. This function is mostlyorganized separately at homes by both families. But now-a-days it is usuallyorganized at marriage halls. The girl usually wears embroidered yellow colordress with cultural beads and fancy bands or sari, and bride wear khussa ascultural shoes.
Bride dress is sent by groom’s family and grooms dress usuallya black shalwar qameez, sherwani or western suit and groom also wear khussa asa cultural shoe. Bride also wear jewelry depend on ethnic background andregional values. In the start of the function,hundred rupee note is set to the bride hand and then elder members start the functionand apply little mehndi on girls hand and then little piece of sweet is fed tothe bride and little amount of oil is applied to the girls head. Then insimilar function continues and in the end there is some musical playing time.Same way of function is done by boy’s side. Family members sing traditionalsongs and there is a competition of songs between both families and functionends gradually.Marriageceremony:This ceremony is different accordingto different cultures.
In Punjabi culture this function is organized by bride’sfamily. But in baloch wedding this is settled by groom’s family. Now-a day’speople don’t trouble themselves and organize function n marriage halls andhotels.Nikkah: Nikkah ceremony, a very holy ceremony is doneby Imam, mufti, sheikh or mullah. This is day when both bride and groom accepteach other as husband and wife in the presence of their family members and inthe presence of religious people to do it rightly.
Firstly grooms Imam goes togrooms side and said some religious words from “RELIGION HOLY BOOK CALLED AS QURAN-E-PAK”. Groomfollow and recite those lines and then give his signature on 4 papers with allreligion or family terms and conditions given by bride’s family. Then pray andblessings are done by all guests for couple happy and prosperous life ahead.Same procedure is followed by brides side, but bride didn’t explore her face infront of unknown person until nikkah ceremony is done Then pray and blessingsis done by all guests for couple happy and prosperous life ahead.Aarsi Mushaf Dikhana:Arsimushaf dikhai commonly called as “Mun dikhai rasm””Showing of the face of bride and girl to each other”.Green embroidered shawlis usually held over the couples head and mirror isgiven to them so that they can see each other first time in the mirror.
Thencouple eat a piece of fruit or sweet with each other than dinner is served toall baratis.Rukhsati:Rukhsatior “sendingoff” takes place when the groom and his family will leave together withthe bride. The Quran is normally held over the brides head as she walks thestage to exit in order to bless and protect her. This is a somber occasion forthe bride’s parents as it marks the departure of their daughter from theirhome.
It is a very emotional scenes she says farewell to the home home of herparents and siblings to start a new married life. Traditionally groom travel tohis house by decorated horse or in a decorated car now-a-days and bride istaken by “doli” called as “Palanquin” to his parents’ house tolive.Dinner:Adinner is served which is consisted of kebabs, naan, shirmal.taftan falooda andkulfi etc. Various forms of meat like roasted mutton, beef, chicken, pulao,biyani, chaanp and chargha served.Gifts:Itis customary for a bride and groom to receive red envelope of money and a lotof gifts from cousins from guests, friends and family in reception. Then newlymarried couple received dinner or party invitations from friends and familymembers to receive reception.Honeymoon:Walima and Shab-i—Zifaf:Waleemaceremony is usually held by groom’s family and they invite bride’s family andtheir own relatives and neighbors.
Then they eat dinner together. Bride wears aheavy dress and gold jewelry from groom’s family. When all guests left thehouse then bride is taken to the fully decorated room by flowers by groom’sfamily members. Face of bride is covered by her own dress shawl. When groomenter in the room, family allows them to stay alone.
Then groom come close tobride and put veil aside to reveal her face as the first new thing at thatnight. Then husband give him a some gift like ring or bracelet or necklacedepends on choice.Regional Variations:Dholki:Doodh pilai:Aceremony in which cousins, friends or family friends bring milk for bride andgroom mixed with nuts etc.
and they then present then some kind of money.Maklava:Asbride is entered in to new life and is sad she is brought back to her parenthouse few days after after the wedding, so that they spent some time with herfamily. Then she is again taken to her husband house.Mahr:Mahr is a mandatory payment, in the form of money orpossessions that will be paid by the groom to the bride. While the mahr is often money, it can alsobe anything agreed upon by the bride such as jewelry, home goods, furniture, adwelling or some land. Mahr is typically specified in the marriage contractsigned during an Islamicmarriage.
Songs:Different marriage songs were singingand played for enjoyment. Traditional Chinese marriage customsTraditionalChinese marriage is very different from modern Chinese marriage trend. Weddingrituals and customs are different regionally, because china has a long, richand extensive history of different cultures that have been subsumed into modernChinese culture. 1. Etymology2. Marriage in Confucian context3. Ancient chinese marriage· Marriagein early societies· Mythologicalorigin· Historicmarriage practices· Maternalmarriage and monogamy· Marriagematters in Xinjiang· Marriageduring the Han dynasty 4. Traditional marriage rituals· Sixetiquettes5.
Modern practices6. Traditional divorce process7. ConclusionEtymology:In ancient writing for the word ?? has (pinyin:h?n, literally means ” dusk, nightfall, twilight,dark”) and the radical ? (pinyin: n?, literally “afemale”). It means if marriage is done at night it will bring fortunefor the couple going to be married.InConfucian though, marriage have grave significance of both the families and tosocieties as well as being important of virtue. Its main purpose that bothfamilies have got same surname and family line and paternal clan. It is becauseof birth of boy over girl. During the Han Dynasty, the rulers of the powerful Xiongnu tribe demanded women from the imperial family.
Manyperiods of Chinese history were dominated by the families of the wife or motherof the ruling emperor.In ancient times traditional Chinese thinks that they did notmarriage in “primitive chinese”. They have no concept of relationship likefather, mother, brother, sister; siblings, husband and wife. They don’t haveany match for marriage with each other.
Then Confucian ‘civilizing mission” wasto define them that there is discrimination among relationships for husband andwife and teach people those family members and regulate sexual behavior. Before moderncivilization people don’t know about marriage concept. Then Nüwa and Fu Xi, they told people about gender discrimination. People lielike animals, then after knowing the gender discrimination then they feltashamed. So they went to Kunlun Shan and prayed to the heaven and ashamed infront of him. They asked for the permission and said “If you allow us to marry,please make a mist surround us”. Then heaven gave permission to the couple andthe peak was covered with mist. Then a girl feels shy and covers her face witha fan.
This tradition is still continues and become a custom in even moderncivilization.Endogamy between different classes of china were practiced,like upper class Shi class people can marry with each other while othercommoners married among themselves. In that time those people don’t marry withtheir slaves and other common peoples.
This was governed by law at that time.In maternal marriage cases husband lives in wife’s home, andthis trend causes the decline of matriarchy and growing dominance of patriarchyin ancient china.According to Islamic tradition Muslims menor women should marry to Muslim person. But in XINJIANG a Chinese man marriedto Muslim turkey women because she was poor. Otherwise she will become aprostitution to live. In this way she got benefit of that she does not have toveil even mullah forces her to do this, because chinese man give her money fornot only for her but also for her family members.Chinese marriage system was startedbetween 42 and 221 BC. Instead of Chinese wide cultural system there are threeletters and six etiquettes.
According to this tradition wife’s mother cannot go to herdaughter’s house for one year but daughter can go anytime to her mother’s home.Six etiquettes:Proposal: An unmarried boyparents found a girl for their son and just match each other family’straditions. Mostly marriages were based on reproduction and honor as well asthe need of father and husband.
Birthdates: If both parents are agreed then matchmaker match bothpartners birthdates (Chinese: ????; pinyin: niáng?ngb?zì; literally: “the 8 cyclic characters for year, month, day andhour of birth of a man, which determine his fate”) in which suanming (Chinesefortune telling) is used to predict the future of that couple-to-be. Bridewealth: Matchmaker arranges a price of bride including a betrothalletter to the girl’s family.Wedding gifts: After setting the price of bride groomsfamily send some sweets, cakes and other religious foods to the bride’s house.Arranging the wedding: Then both family members arrange adate for wedding according to TUN SHING.
Modern practices: In modern practice newlywed couple goes for photography indifferent outfits and in different places belonging to their culture. But inmandarin Chinese there are no first days of spring, like in 2010.They believethat in 2010 it was a year of tiger and they believe that this year is very luck and ominous tostat any business or wedding.Beforebride and groom enter into nuptial chambers, they have to do ceremonial bows asfollows;1.
First bow is for heavens and earth2. Second bow is for ancestors3. Third bow is for parents4. Fourth bow is for spouse.Traditional divorce processThere are threeways of divorce.
· First way is “no fault divorce”. According to Tang Dynasty(618-907) a marriage can be dissolved due to persona issues.· Second way is to mandate annulment marriage. It occurs whenany spouse do a serious crime.
· It is due to unilaterally declare a divorce by seven ways, ifgirl do this, 1. Fails to bears a son2. Jealousy3. Serious or chronic disease4. Gossipy 5. Commits theft6.
Filial piety 7. Vulgar or lewdConclusion: Marriage customs and traditions globally are different and itis all due to their ancestor’s culture. Every country has different and widerich culture, which explore their religious and cultural values.
Despite ofhaving different cultures some cultural points relevant with each other, buttheir performing way is different. It’s not only the sexual attachment witheach other but also the combination of both families so that they can sharetheir happiness and sorrows with each other.